The Apostles of our church have a specific order in which they
direct there meetings each week. There order in which they follow is very important
and we are able to learn a lot from them if we use this order in our lives
whether it be marriage or with roommates. To start off the Apostles always have
a specific spot in which they will meet and they have a certain time set aside
for it. They hold their meetings every week in the temple. This is their holy
area but we are able to conduct these meetings in our homes as well because
they are a holy area. The specific order that they follow will be explained
below in these six steps. I will also state the importance of using this
pattern in our own lives and marriages.
1.
The Brethren always get to the meeting a little
bit early so they are able to express their love for one another. They are able
to really understand each other and get to know the things that are going on in
their lives as well as their family’s lives. We should do this so we are
building a strong relationship with our spouse and those around us. If we don’t
truly care about one another then how are we supposed to get to a consensus?
2.
They then begin with a pray to start off the
meeting. This brings the spirit into the room and makes it so they are able to
follow upon what Heavenly Father wants them to do and not just there selves. This
is very important because we need to be wanting what Heavenly Father wants for
us and not be egocentric.
3.
After the prayer they talk about the agenda. They
don’t just get to the meeting and say, ‘well what do you want to talk about
today’. They have specific items that they need to talk about and cover. When
they cover them they do it with openness and an objective. This is very
important because we need to know what we are having the meeting for and we
need to both be on the same page. This will make life easier. Brother Williams
suggested having a piece of paper on the fridge and when we run into things
throughout the week that we would like to talk about we should write them down.
If as we go throughout the week and what we wanted to talk about has been fixed
or taken care of we are now able to cross it off of the list. The list will
help each other to understand better what each other’s feeling are and what principles
they need to work on together. The Brethren have an objective and openness
which is what we should have as well. Our objective that we should strive to
get to it finding the truth in what the Lord wants to happen. Our openness
should not be brutal honest but we should be open enough that we are able to
accept what your spouse thoughts are with an open mind.
4.
The next step is to discuss everything to a consensus
with regard to what the Lord wants. Consensus is different form compromise. Coming
to a consensus means that everyone is able to come to the same decision rather than
bending one another’s idea to get to a compromise. This is also shown by taking
time to understand what everyone thinks and has a say. We are counseling
together not just delegating to one person. We are all in this together and we
should be happy in the answers that we come to.
5.
They also end with a prayer. This helps everyone
to continue to have the spirit with them and we should be thanking Heavenly
Father for giving us the answers and being able to come to a consensus about
the items we talked about.
6.
Like at the first of their meeting they take time
to be able to talk to each other about their personal lives and express their
love for one another. To do this at the end of each meeting they have
refreshments. This helps bring everyone closer and to understand each other
better. We should always do something to express our love for our spouse at the
end of meetings. This will help us to remain close and to build a stronger
relationship with them.
This process is very important in
communication and problem solving in marriages. We should all strive to follow
this pattern that has been shown to us. It will help us in communication with each other.
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